dear effect

i had one of the most random days today.
this morning i had MUN at 8am.
now, this is the first time in 3 years that i've decided to be a part of MUN - i blame myself for not joining sooner.
i recently chose to study international relations at a university level and this experience has convinced me more than anything that i've made the right choice.
i really can't describe exactly how much i enjoyed that.

anyway, after MUN i came home.
i spoke to my friend for a couple of hours and i thought; maybe i should cut my hair.
i looked at haircuts online, found one in 2 minutes - half an hour later i watched the hairdresser raise the scissors up to my bangs.
i watched as she absent-mindedly chopped away my hair.
i saw sections of my hair fall into my lap
and i looked at them
i saw the pretty streaks of brown, gold and orange in the chopped pieces
and i thought "what the hell am i doing? why did i suddenly decide to cut my hair? why did i choose to cut so much of it?"
i stared at the pile of hair as it grew and i realised;
i wanted to destroy something beautiful.

recently i've been receiving a lot of compliments about my hair and specifically the colour.
i guess i subconsciously made the decision it was time to destroy it.
people are not defined by their hair, bodies, eyes, legs, or even by how many medals they have, how many certificates they've been awarded or by how many competitions they've won.
compliments aren't a bad thing, that's not what i mean by my statement above.

either way, i'm happy with my decision to cut my hair, and that's that...
but every once in a while i think it's good for people to destroy something.
it's human nature.